Mortified. That is really the best word to use to describe the moment. We all remember high school: the emotions, the hormones, the friendships, the insecurities, the drama. I really enjoyed high school; I had many friends that sat at different tables during lunch, I was an athlete, and I made great grades. This particular day however, I could have gone without.
How many times have you said one of the following:
I’m going to start working out.
I’m going to start eating right.
Once I finish (insert any excuse, i.e. college, this project, this class, this series on Netflix) I’m going to get in shape.
Starting in January…
On Monday, I’m going on a diet
There are two types of pregnant women: those who enjoy every minute of it and those that guiltily hate almost every minute. I hated almost every minute. I have given birth to two wonderful boys whom I love very much; however, the process of them coming into existence in this world was one that I did not cherish.
Pregnancy was hard. It drained me of all energy, I was horribly sick during the first trimester, I had terrible heartburn, and the changes I saw in my body tore me up emotionally. I know, blah blah blah poor you. Bare with me.
At the very beginning of my first pregnancy, a woman decided to tell me that my body would never be the same and to get used to it. I have never been overweight, but I was always self-conscious about my body and never truly happy with it, so this was a huge blow. I didn’t want to have the “mom” body for the rest of my life. I was only 24 for God’s sake! What a great picture this woman gave me!
I went through that pregnancy without any medical issues or concerns but would cry while by myself as I saw the changes in my body that were supposed to be “beautiful.” And then I would feel horrible guilt and cry some more about how I was crying over my body changing and not embracing it like I was “supposed” to. It sucked. Seriously. After my first son was born, the pounds flew off. I was breastfeeding and not really doing much exercise, but he sucked all that baby weight right off. By the time he was one and weaning, I weighed less than I had since middle school. I felt really good about myself. And then, the unthinkable happened. Surprise! Pregnant with baby number 2!